Today, Ginger limped on her right front leg for the first time. Her back right leg has been bothersome now and then. Before knowing about the cancer, I thought it was from playing too hard and muscle aches.

I reached down to massage her under her front arm pit, and felt the hard, massive lump there. How fast these ugly tumors grow. When her back leg would ache, I could massage the pain away. But it wasn’t so for this disgusting thing I felt beneath her today. She didn’t get comfort from my massage, so I stopped. Instead, for the first time, I went into the house to look at the two bottles of pills the veterinarian sent home with us. I noticed they were for pain. That’s all I looked at when I put them in the medicine chest. I didn’t believe we would need them. I thought praying, diet, lots of love and visualization would clear Ginger’s body of the cancer. But this cancer is deaf to the tones of healing. It’s claimed her body and is taking it over without mercy.

I read the bottles today, figuring I would have to guess which pain pill to give her. Not so. This veterinarian knew what was coming. I chose the bottle that said, “Give for pain and limping,” and gave her the dose with food.

Ginger still played. She tried to keep up, but she wears out faster now. Luigi is her best playmate. He is my boy, and is the best energy around this house. He played her game, and we are blessed for his patience and fun spirit. No matter who he’s battling wits with.

Bouchard has been the most blessed by Ginger’s adoption. She came home on December 7, 2005. She brought him out of his shell and taught him to play. Ginger is the only red girl in the pack, and Bouchard is a red boy. Ginger validated him. Bouchard was pulled from a shelter when he was under a year old, a skin-and-bones boy who’d been left behind when his people moved. He was scared, water he drank went right through him, and he had no concept of dogspeak. He seemed to think any move towards him by a dog was an aggressive one and he’d react first, think later. He’s much better now, and a lot of credit goes to Ginger who gently got his playful self rolling. I have a feeling Bouchard isn’t doing well with recognizing Ginger’s new scents. The scents from cancer. Tonight, he chose to watch the sunset rather than play.